I don't know. If it really happened -- if I really did hurt someone I care about -- I don't think it's fair to keep running from it. But... every time I try to think back to early on in my life, to the things I can't remember very well -- I can't do it for very long because it hurts. [Literally. It's paralyzed him with physical pain the past, even nearly made him lose consciousness. It's not as bad as it used to be, but he still avoids trying for that reason.
PTSD does that to a person.]
It might be the same with this. I might not... be able to remember even if I do try.
[It's all about the "if," though, isn't it?
But her suggestion makes him pause.]
Maybe... Like I said, I don't want to run from it. And... if that file's right, the person I'm talking about might still be alive. If he is... [Then Ven needs to know everything he can. How Aqua managed to hold him off, how he was actually defeated... The next time -- if there is a next time -- Ven might not have the option of pulling a suicide move to take him down.] ...but -- you really think someone could help with that?
no subject
I don't know. If it really happened -- if I really did hurt someone I care about -- I don't think it's fair to keep running from it. But... every time I try to think back to early on in my life, to the things I can't remember very well -- I can't do it for very long because it hurts. [Literally. It's paralyzed him with physical pain the past, even nearly made him lose consciousness. It's not as bad as it used to be, but he still avoids trying for that reason.
PTSD does that to a person.]
It might be the same with this. I might not... be able to remember even if I do try.
[It's all about the "if," though, isn't it?
But her suggestion makes him pause.]
Maybe... Like I said, I don't want to run from it. And... if that file's right, the person I'm talking about might still be alive. If he is... [Then Ven needs to know everything he can. How Aqua managed to hold him off, how he was actually defeated... The next time -- if there is a next time -- Ven might not have the option of pulling a suicide move to take him down.] ...but -- you really think someone could help with that?